Saturday, September 29, 2012

You're to Kind......

There are a lot of good people out there in the world. People who are saving lives, or taking care of the elderly. You know people making a difference in somebody else's life, today. I am not one of those people. That's not to say I don't do my fair share of good deeds. Why just yesterday I made a fresh pot of coffee at the office when the old one was getting low. That's something right? And I most always put the toilet seat down here at the Palace so when the DW sits down she doesn't get her tushy all wet. I'm sure she appreciates that.

But lets face it, my acts of kindness, I mean true-go-out-of-my-way-to-be-kind-to-someone acts of kindness are few and far between. Oh sure I do something nice like get up on my in-laws roof to help repair a leak even though everybody knows I'm terrified of ladders, or help move some furniture from upstairs to downstairs. But again, that's an every now and then kind of thing. Or maybe more to the point, a when I'm asked to kind of thing.

So recently my SIL turned 30 and decided to start a very noble project. She's calling it her 30 Random Acts of Kindness in 30 Days. The idea is she does a random act of kindness each day for the next 30 days. Pretty simple right? Well I don't know about you, but I have a hard time doing anything for 30 days in a row, let alone being nice to people. But she is. She's done things like purchase gift cards for the customer behind her at Starbucks. Passed out gift bags of quarters at the local laundry mat, and sent coupons overseas for soldiers and their families. I love the idea and honestly, wish I'd thought of it first. She posts each days Random Act on Facebook and I gotta say, it keeps me on the edge of my seat waiting to see what she'll do next.

So a huge shout out to today my SIL. You keep doing your Thang, and Thanks for your Kindness...

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Funny and Witty...

Hey Lifers...

So today right before lunch I sent the DW a message asking her if she had any plans for lunch. She said she didn't and mentioned that we had leftovers if I was coming home. I informed her that unless she had something special planned for my lunch hour I'd just go into town and get something....I ate lunch alone. Below is the actual conversation we had later through IM.

Sent at 12:50 PM on Tuesday
Her: what you have for lunch? i'm having one of those steak n shake chilis. surprised that i actually like it.
 me: I had Shitdonalds
 her: yum
me: yep....I blame you
her: why?
me: because you didn't want to do it
 her: what else is new? that's not an excuse to choke down fatty donalds
me: i was depressed
her: i find it depressing that you drowned your sorrows in mcdonalds
hope you at least got a sweet tea
and fresh fries instead of soggy old fries
Sent at 12:56 PM on Tuesday me: I did get a sweet tea. and it is depressing that I have to turn to yucky McDonalds to
get some lovin'
 her: badabopbopbop... you're lovin it.
i'm slightly witty and funny today, right?
me:You see the big cycle of my depression. Now I'm depressed again because I had to turn to McD's...Oh yes your witty and funny...
her:i am. 
me: you get it from me
her: do not
me: yes you do.
I'm witty and funny all the time, some has to rub off on you
her: i've turned out 3 galleries since last night. and i'm gonna get another one out in just a few minutes. i'm a machine today!!!
 me: you are the energizer bunny....speaking of bunnies....
 her: omg. you never quit, do you?
 me: never. the day I quit is the day you'll know I'm terminally ill.
 her: i guess
me: so maybe we should go ahead and do it then because I'll be dead soon
omg. i just spit diet coke out.
me: that's because I'm funny...and witty

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

How's about a little Somethin-Somethin...

OK so as you know I started a new job last month right? So far I'm enjoying the increase in pay, the hours, and the fact that it's in my own town. It's only about twelve minutes away from my house which is awesome. I've met the wife in town for lunch a few times already. I can run errands in town and know where places are, and It's even close enough that I can come home for lunch. And now that all three clowns are in school, it's just the DW and I for these lunch dates. It's been a bonus that I didn't consider before taking the position.

But here's the thing. I'm a guy right? And as a guy with no clowns present for lunch, I've put in a request with the DW for..well you know, a little somethin-somethin on my lunch hour.

Now I don't think this is an outrageous request, I mean after all, I really only need a few minutes of her time, and that's with her making me a sandwich. We're married right? I'm a guy, she's a chick, right?

Now at least once a week I make this request only to be shot down without hesitation by my beautiful bride. Now I'm not asking to come home and find Larry Flint ready to put some fantastic story in the Penthouse fourms here. But none the less the answer is still no. But that doesn't stop me from asking, again, I'm a guy.

And who knows, tomorrow's a new day, and just maybe I'll get a little somethin-somethin with that sandwich......


Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Horrible Bosses...

Through the years I've had a lot of different jobs. I've worked in retail, fast food, on a farm and in factories. I've bussed tables, picked up dog poop and mowed lawns for cash. I've been paid by piece, by hour, and by salary. So I've become quite the expert on bosses. More to the point, horrible bosses

I once had a boss who could never remember my name. He was close most of the time. In the beginning I'd correct him and he'd apologize, but wouldn't remember. After a while I stopped correcting him. I mean why the hell did I care what he called me as long as it was right on my pay stub.

I once had a boss who picked his nose and wipe it around his desk, or just eat it. I'm not making this stuff up people. I liked the guy well enough, and he liked my work, but I never could get past the nose picking/eating thing. I mean what grown man does that? He once handed me back a paper that had boogie on it. I near puked.

I once had a boss who was a gun nut. One Saturday he locked himself in his office with the lights off and a revolver in his hand. Thank goodness he didn't do anything stupid. It would've sucked to have had to work overtime because the boss killed himself. But it did make for an uneasy shift.

I once had a boss who would pick the ear wax from his ear and eat it. Again, not making this up. He would talk to you in normal conversation then nonchalant like dig at his ear. Then pretend to bite his fingernail. Sometimes he'd pull his finger out and look at the wax before biting his nail. Nice.

I once had a boss who drank on the job. He would sometimes come to work tipsy and about half way through the night he would disappear for awhile. An hour or so later he'd appear feeling better and smelling a bit.

So with starting a new job a few weeks ago, I'm sort of looking forward to some new blog material from this one. Stay tuned...