Thursday, July 14, 2011

Get a tissue

Hey Lifers...

A couple of Tuesdays ago, I came home and found two of my three clowns doing something that reminded me of today's post. 

Now on Tuesdays here at the Palace I don't let my clowns watch T.V. We call it No T.V. Tuesday. Pretty clever huh? I came up with the name all by myself. Anyway, they have to find other ways to occupy themselves all day. Read a book, use their imagination, or heaven for bid, play an actual board game. So anyway, we don't turn on the t.v on Tuesdays, that's just how we roll.

So my youngest two were playing the game Operation. Well I sat down and began to watch them play. Now I'm not exactly sure if he would have, had I not interrupted, but it appeared that mini-me was about to put one of the pieces up his nose. OK who'm I kidding. Of course we would have, he's Mini-me.

OK so here's the story. When I was about his age, I too put something up my nose that shouldn't have been there. Now if you're old enough to remember when toy guns were cool, then you remember cap guns right?

Well my older brother and I had cap guns, all sorts of cap guns like this one. This one in the picture has the ring type caps, but we also had the just single caps. You'd load them in the chamber one at a time and fire.

Well I used to love the smell of the caps after they were shot... are you seeing where this is going people?

Yeah so one day I'm in my room by myself and fire off one of these caps. Where were my parents you ask? Why am I firing cap guns in the house you ask? Who knows. My parents liked to party and traveled with the Grateful Dead for most of my youth. OK really they didn't but that might help explain a few things if it were true.

So anyway, I remove the cap from the gun to smell the burnt powder, and wouldn't you know it the thing goes right up my nose. Most people at this point might begin to blow their nose, however I am not most people, and come on I was like 5 or 7 or 14, whatever, it doesn't matter that's not important. Instead I begin to dig around up there. Of course the more I did the farther up it goes. 

I start to panic. Oh crap what am I going to do? I can not tell my parents I put a cap up my nose. That will be too embarrassing. I keep digging. Crap I can't get it. Oh man I'm gonna have to tell 'em. Keep digging. They're going to make fun of me for the rest of my life. Keep digging, cap nearly touching my brain. No way, can't tell 'em. Have to keep this on the down low. What should I do? 

I've got it...My Brother. Yeah good call there. Surely your brother will not make fun of you for the rest of your life because you put a cap up your nose. Swwwiiiinnng and a miss. 

Frantically I open my bedroom door and call for him to come. He does. I explain the situation. His response: Plug the the other side and blow. 


Tell me Lifers, ever put something up your nose or in your ear that you shouldn't have?


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