Monday, October 31, 2011

My Uncool Moment...

Hey Lifers...

Ok so through the years I've been know to be a little scatter brained. You know simple stuff like driving the wrong way down a one way street, getting lost in a strange town, forgetting where my keys are. Nothing major, but things that definitely make the DW question my senility.

So this past weekend the DW and I went out to dinner. We went to a new place, had a great dinner and an overall great evening.

Now before I go any further let me give you a little back story.

My DW has discovered this Sims like game about cooking on her phone. Every down second she has of every day she plays this stupid game. I have no idea what it is, I just know she's addicted to it.

Ok so moving on....

So we go to this restaurant and we put our names in at the hostess station. I head to the bathroom while she has a seat and begins playing that stupid game on her phone.

I make my way to the bathroom. I walk in and head toward the back. There's someone in the first stall so I opt for the second. And no I wasn't doing the 2.

I start going pee. I know great visual right? Anyway, while I'm standing there, I hear voices. At first they sound like maybe they're out in the lobby. Ladies voices. Then they appear to be louder. Then suddenly it dawns on me. I look around...then I see something that looks like this...

OMG. OMG.OMG.....I'M IN THE LADIES RESTROOM....OMG. OMG. OMG. So I finish my business. What, I had to go.

My mind races. What in the world am I gonna do? OMG. I know. I'll text the wife and have her come in here and make sure the coast is clear before I walk out. This is my text:  Omg help I'm in the women's bathroom.

So I climb on top of the toilet and wait for her. She doesn't answer for what seems like forever. I'm starting to panic. What do I do? I'm stuck in the women's bathroom. There's no way we're eating here if someone catches me in here. Where is she? Why hasn't she come in here?

All the while women are coming and going. Washing hands, going potty, doing whatever women do in here. OMG where is she.

So at this point it's pretty obvious that my DW is either putting me through the best punishment imaginable, or she's playing that stupid game and not checking her text. I've got one shot. I've gotta just do it like removing a band-aid. Just open the door and go as fast as I can.

I make sure I don't hear anybody washing hands and make a break for it.

I manage to get out without anybody, that I know of, seeing me. I walk out and notice, sure enough the DW has her head buried in her phone playing her game.

I tell her to check her text, and explain to her what happened. Her dork.


Leave me a comment Lifers.....


  1. O My Goodness! I seriously laughed my butt off reading this! So glad you have a blog to share your fun moments that make us chuckle...or in my case laugh my head off!

  2. OMG! hahahahahahahaha!!! hahahahahahaha!!! I can't think of anything else to write but hahahahahahaha!!!

    Dude, that totally sucks!!! Just another reason for me not to get a smart phone! hahahahahahaha!!!