Saturday, September 3, 2011

Man I need a Life...

Hey Lifers....

So it turns out that there were two significant events in my day yesterday, and unfortunately both of them evolved around poop. OK maybe significant is not exactly the right word to use here, but I have no life. I know gross and sad huh? But hey just like the book says, Everybody Poops.

So were driving down the road last night on the way home from our usual Friday night dinner, grocery shopping extravaganza, when the DW and I both smell something foul. The clowns were asleep in the back seat so I was pretty sure it was something outside.

A few minutes go by and the DW says something like eeww gross, to which I reply, yeah that's pretty nasty. A few seconds later she looks at me and says. Was that you

Because of the magnitude of the smell, I'm not sure if I should be offended or proud?

But that can not possibly top this.

So yesterday I'm at work and I have to do the dreaded Number 2. Not something I want to do at this place, but hey when you gotta go you gotta go right?

Anyway I'm in there doing my business, and in walks somebody else. He sits down and fumbles around for a few minutes. Then out of nowhere I the opening of a pop can....Pssshhh.

What? Are you kidding me? Some tard actually brought a Coke into the men's bathroom? And opened it? And is now drinking it?

I don't even like to breathe in there, let alone drink something. I could understand it if this was your own house, but you're in the MEN'S ROOM AT WORK. Do you know what kind of cooties linger in here?

Perhaps you didn't read my Office Memo awhile back? Or perhaps you're just an idiot? What's next, save a little time by combining lunch with your trips to the can?

C'mon Man.


Leave me a comment Lifers..


  1. I think I just threw up a little in my mouth. Pop in the bathroom? Ewwwww! Nasty!

  2. I'm thinking it wasn't a coke. Who brings soda to the bathroom at work? I'd say you need to start giving breathalyzers when people exit the bathroom!

    But no matter what he was drinking, let me be clear...EWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!