Thursday, November 4, 2010

A long week

What a week.
Very emotional week and it's not even over. Let's see Monday we found out about a friends passing. Tuesday was election day, Wednesday was our Anniversary, and today was our friends wake. Like I said been a emotional busy week.

It was nice to see so many people tonight paying their respects at the wake.
I didn't know what to say when we went up to the casket to meet his wife. She looks thin and tired. We speak briefly. I'm sure I sounded like an idiot. (Why is it that when you're trying not to say the wrong thing is usually when you say the wrong thing)?
She smiles and nods, and thanks us for coming.  I'm sure the same smile and nod she'd been doing for the last couple of hours. I mean what else can you do at that moment, when you've just lost your 39 year old husband and father of your 4 children?

I couldn't help but get a little teary eyed when I came to his oldest son (maybe just out of high school). In a flash I thought about this young man and how he was now going to be the "man of the house". I felt so sorry for him. Heck I feel sorry for them all, but I feel a stronger understanding towards him being both a son and a father. I thought about what he must be going through, what he must be feeling.
Again, I have nothing encouraging or worthy to say as I approach him.
I see his eyes. The eyes of a scared, angry, sad young man.
I hug him. I can tell at first he just wants to shake. But I hug him. I fight back my tears. I tell him to be strong and hang in there. He smiles and nods. All the while I'm sure fighting back the rage and hurt that is inside him.

Afterwords I had a long quite drive over to my in-laws to pick up a couple of clowns. On the way over my mind wandered. And I thought, what a week.


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